Belong

 

 Put your coat on and put your shoes on and let’s go see what we can find.

You don’t belong here and neither do I though we tried to make it yours and mine.

We don’t belong. But it won’t be long.

Follow me dear. Or maybe you lead me. Wherever we are I’ll be fine.

 

 I don’t know how to lead you anywhere. I make it all up as I go.

But they tell me that it’s up to me so the best I can is all you know.

And if I’ve been wrong for oh so long…

Forgive me my sins and I will forgive yours with a love that they don’t know.

 

I tried to wash your feet. You tried to cleanse me. I tried to give us all a home.

But they don’t think like me and they don’t think like you so now, I think we’re on our own.

We tried so hard. It’s time to depart.

 

We’ll be okay though. Wherever we go we’ll carve a home out of the stone.

 

A home where we fit, a place where we can stick, a place where we can both belong.

 

And if it’s just us we’ll make it enough. Wherever you are I’ll be home.

 

 So put your coat on and put your shoes on and together we’ll just start to roam.

 

 

Safe and Lonely

 There’s a room we built to keep us safe and lonely.

First we sound-proofed then we papered all the walls.

Invited all our friends to stay there with our families.

Then we waited for the fall- the fall.

Then we waited for the fall.

 

We shared everything- at first it was a comfort.

The fear that kept us there- it kept the others out.

But then the walls began to feel a bit more cage-like.

Soon the comfort made us shout- a shout.

Then I needed to get out…

 

 Out in the rain…

 

 In the corner by the door’s a stone collection.

We drew some straws to see who could throw one first.

But soon we found that we couldn’t see the targets.

That thing in my eye- it was dirt- was dirt.

It was just that and nothing worse.

 

After hours passed the company grew weary.

The sound of no rain cast a pall upon the ark.

Some decided that the rain was never coming.

So they snuck out in the dark.

So they snuck out in the dark.

 

Out in the rain…

 

 

Until, Unless

 You told me that “God is dead.” Put that worm up in my head- put it in

If that’s true there there’s a time when He must have been alive- must have been

And if He lived but then He didn’t then His name, it just don’t fit- doesn’t fit

So if His name was never God, then some imposter stole His spot- wasn’t Him

 

Until you hold an angel’s hair you won’t believe that He is there.

Until He proves Himself to you, you won’t believe that He’s with you.

Until you see the burning bush, until you see the waters part,

Until the manna falls for you, you won’t believe He loves you too

Until

Unless

 

You say we are random here- built from nothing over years-many years

And if there’s God and if He cares let Him show His face right here- bring Him in

Cause I’ve got questions filling me, but I won’t ask what I can’t see- face to face

And as I listen still to you I see you really wish it true- Oh don’t you?

 

Unless He shows His face…

 

And if He meets you on your terms and shows His holy face to you- will you believe?

I wonder if it’s Him you want? Or can you just not bear the thought of something more?

Cause if life means something bigger than the things we’ve given ourselves to- well what then?

It’s so much easier to say “Until He speaks I’ll live this way”- Isn’t it?

 

Weight of Water

 

There’s a weight of water and the water’s wine

And it falls on me- hurts me every time.

There’s a quiet promise that now sits there on my mind.

 

There’s a fire beside me in this empty room.

And it warms my heart and it warms my tomb.

I can only get so close until I burn.

 

There’s a weight of water (falling down)

Over me

 

The decisions made by a naïve child

Have to rule me now so please, just go

You will have to leave and take your fire with you.

 

Stop distracting me now, I’ve got my life.

I’ve got children now, for them and my wife

I can no longer harbor these thoughts you gently bring.

 

And you will not pass this way again, no you will not pass this way again

No, you will not return

 

 

Down in the River

 

Down in the river, yes down in the river I waited for you to speak.

And all that I knew was the stories they had told us.

And that’s all I expected to see.

 

Down in the river, yes down in the river when the rapture had finally passed

And the reverend and the deacon and the others had left us.

And the beast had taken charge at last.

 

I heard your voice.

I heard you speak.

I heard you call to me.

You whispered love.

You whispered grace.

You whispered joy and peace.

 

Down in the river, yes down in the river when the waters had all turned to blood.

You told me to wade in, you told me to swim in.

You taught me to welcome the flood.

 

Down in the river, yes down in the river while the sheep were all scoffing at the goats.

And the mark on my wrist and the other on my forehead

Were burning holes in me as I tried to float.

 

Down in the river, yes down in the river I searched for I didn’t know just who.

Cause all that I knew was the story they had told me.

Which, it turns out, didn’t look much like you.

Down in the river, yes down in the river

 

 

Alkaline

 

Tonight we don’t have the time- don’t have the time, yeah.

Tonight we go alkaline- we go alkaline, yeah.

 

There’s just too much pressure to follow. They never stop asking for just one more thing.

Just as soon as they’re fed they get hungry again.

You want us to leave? You want this to sting?

 

Ooh… It’s more than I wanted. Ooh…

 

I’m tired of bathwater- tired of babies. I’m tired of being too tired to sing.

There’s good to be done every second of living.

I’m tired of squeezing in just one more thing.

 

Ooh… It’s more than I wanted.

Ooh… It’s more than we need, more than we…

Ooh… No more obligations.

 

Maybe Someday

 

Was gonna write you an angry letter and let the madness all come out

Started playing and soon I’m finding the words just cannot come out.

Cannot come out. Cannot come out.

 

How can I curse you and how can I bless you when both come out my same mouth?

I got no answers. I just have questions and through the tears they all pour out.

They all pour out. They all pour out.

 

How do I trust you on days like today?

How does the same hand give while it takes?

Maybe sometime…   Maybe someday…

 

Maybe someday instead of pain I can focus more on the light.

Maybe someday when death’s a memory I won’t be scared of the night.

Maybe someday. Maybe someday.

 

I tried to write you an angry letter cause the woods of darkness stifled me.

I couldn’t write it cause the forest’s strong with the light of life from off the tree.

I need more faith. Maybe someday

Maybe someday. But just not today…

 

 

Leah and Rachel

 

I wanted to be further from me and closer to where I belong.

And you showed me truth, but you showed me you- two brothers that I can’t relate.

I followed you all the years of my youth. I filled your cathedrals with song.

But gone is the veil that you wore at the sale when I bought all you sold me that day.

 

And dried are the flowers you gave me

Gone is that honeymoon phase.

I just wanted to be further from me and closer to where I belong.

 

I worked 7 years. I toiled and teared for the bride that I knew was my love.

But so goes the tale, when I lifted the veil there was a woman that I’d never known.

So I worked 7 more- for love I was sure. My hands became calloused and rough.

Now I wonder once more if the one I’ve toiled for is the beauty that I had been shown.

 

Cause you would not look at my family. And you made me leave all I love.

You cast aside, with those sweet, haughty eyes, everyone that you judged to be wrong.

 

I just wanted to be further from me and closer to where I belong.

 

 

The Straw Man VS. The Paper Tiger

 

 

It started innocent- You just had to vent

I couldn’t let it be- You just had to see

I picked up a stack- A generation on my back

One voice to rule them all- Cause one voice can say it all

 

How quickly words are said- How quickly lines are burned

How foolishly we were wise- All the while we were taking turns

Our words were in the air- A keystroke put them there

For all the world to laugh- We can never take them back

 

There is a place where everything you’ve ever said is all written down.

Even God don’t need to keep a book anymore cause it’s all written down

It’s vapor in the cloud. It’s vapor in the cloud.

 

I guess I needed a muse- That you could not refuse

I guess you had your own- So we can all see just where this goes

When tragedies are stats- And heartaches, bullet-points

When every loss becomes a martyr to us

Then things no longer mean.

 

 

 

It’s Alright

 

It’s alright if I’m confused. The world, it don’t spin like it used to do.

I’m lighting my candles now in the middle of the days.

When the darkness ain’t even upon me yet.

 

What’ll I do? What’ll I do?

 

It’s alright if you wanna cry. You’re from the same sticks and stones as I.

How’re the days so long when the years, they go so fast?

It never used to bother you at all

 

What’ll you do? What’ll you do?

What’ll you do? What’ll you do?

 

You said “Hey, my mind is set”. You said “Hey, my mind is set

 

It’s alright if we’re confused. The world, it don’t spin like it used to do.

We’re lighting our candles now in the middle of the days.

When the darkness ain’t even upon us yet.

 

 

 

 

 Alone With My Thoughts

 

Alone with my thoughts, all alone in my mind

There is wonder in exploring all the paths that I find

There is hope, there is cynicism, always new discoveries there for me.

My thoughts stray where they will stray and they go where they will go

And I know that they’ll return, but rarely come back alone.

There’s a comfort in numbers but the crowd begins to be too much for me.

 

All alone with my thoughts is a dangerous place for me to be.

 

Tell me, do you want to walk away

On some paths I’ve never tread?

Oh tell me, do you want to run around with me

In some place I’ve never been?

 

Alone with my thoughts, I feel terribly wise

I can dream I can stop all the world’s greatest fights

I know exactly how the world should work- exactly just how everything should be.

Alone with my thoughts, there’s no accountability.

All the giants on whose shoulders have just borne the weight of me

Start to scratch their heads and wonder ‘bout these crazy new ideas they have seen.

 

All alone with my thoughts is a dangerous place for me to be.

 

Just a little time alone and pretty soon I’ve got all the answers…

 

 

 

 Who?

 

You awoke upon the day that you were woken- words were spoken- you were lovely.

Soon you crossed the line that you were meant to walk on- could not get back on- but you walked on

 

Time since passed you find yourself with hours- should be flowers in your hands

But you left the walks to feel dead grass in your toes- wasn’t worth it- now you know

 

 

Ooh… Who was there to save but you?

Ooh… Who was there to save but you?

 

Well your life was full of things and stuff and somethings- maybe nothings- it still felt empty

Now you look back to the day when you were woken- words were spoken- you were lovely

 

When the night closed in there was no armor shining- no reminding of what you once were

When your husband found you lying in the darkness- He could have left but- He picked you up